The Value of Kind People

If you can't tell, I love the movie, "About Time".  I feel like I have learned so much about life from this movie.  I would have to rank, "About Time", "Meet Joe Black", and "The Legend of Bagger Vance" as the 3 movies that have shaped my life the most.  Most people don't like these movies at all, but it is fitting, because I don't like most things most people like ha ha. 

I've been thinking a lot lately about the value of kind people. Not the cliched "oh they are nice" type person, but the type of person that if you could only categorize them into one word, it would be "Kind". They are often ironically unnoticed, but invaluable to any person, family, group, or office. They are the true heroes, the salt of the earth type people that often get no proper appreciation and the people I wish to tribute this post to.

I am certain no one in my family reads my blog, so I am going to talk about them. I feel like I have 2 siblings that are extremely kind, my brother Jon and my sister Rachel. Now, I love my family and each member is amazing, but I am starting to value pure and simple kindness a lot more. Maybe that is just called growing up ha ha.

A few weeks ago, I said goodbye to my little sister, Rachel for 18 months. She is serving an LDS mission in Independence, Missouri.  She is one of the kindest (if not the kindest) person I know.  My family are all LDS (that sounds like terrible grammar, but I know I am not the smartest) and I have had 2 older brothers and 3 younger brothers serve missions. I have missed everyone when they left, but looking back, I really missed Jon and Rachel a lot.  Especially Rachel.  She never called for attention, yet everyone loved her.  I have never heard her complain or mope around and she was always more concerned about your life than dumping her life, accolades and/or problems on you.  Simply put, she is originally beautiful and truly kind.  I feel bad, because I didn't really appreciate her as much as I should have when she was around,  But, you know that saying, "It is better to appreciate later, than never at all." - Ben Wilkey (I just made that up ha ha).

Perhaps the most boggling characteristic about kind people is that they do it out of the goodness of their hearts, never seeking the praise so many of us desperately need to operate.  This is obviously a  major characteristic of Christianity, and most major religions that I am aware of.  If this is know by all, why is that so few people practice it?  I know I struggle with it, I love the attention, but I always brush it off like I don't.

So, I say we start appreciating the kind people.  Let's push aside the flamboyant, troublesome, sometimes awesome, loud, in your face, attention getting people for a moment and seek out the often times quiet, but steady and noble kind ones.  I know that I have people in my office and circles that are often unnoticed, but would do anything for you if needed.  These are the types of people that I want to emulate and surround myself with.  I value the kind people more, because I know I am not one of them.  I want to be like them.  Maybe I am just getting old and sentimental.  Maybe it's a culmination of a lot of things, especially my sister Rachel leaving.  Whatever it is, I am happy I have come to this realization now, because I wouldn't be the person I am without the kind people in my life.  They make this life a lot better for all of us. So, thank you beautiful, kind people for selflessly making all of our lives better. (Jon, you are the man.  Rachel, you are the best!)  I hope you get the recognition, love and adoration you truly deserve.

Curious to hear your thoughts.  Thanks for reading.

-Ben

Time

I watched this video last week and it has consumed my thoughts. Watch it.

How are you spending your time?  If I look back at my last year, I would say that I spent most of my time working.  If you read any blog about old people giving advice to the younger generations, one strain of advice is common, "I wish I would have spent more time with my loved ones."  Nobody wishes they would have worked more, especially a job they didn't enjoy.

There are 2 quotes that I live by: "It's all about the relationships" and "People are the best part of life."  I feel when I have this perspective, I am a lot happier and truer to myself and what's important.  Lately, I feel as if I have been off track and focused more on money and work.  This video came across my path at the perfect time and I am thankful for it. I feel like work has consumed my life and it is time to take a step back.

Ask yourself how you would feel if you died tomorrow?  I know that might sound morbid, but really reflect and be honest with yourself.  How would you view your life on earth?  Would you have any regrets, and if so, what would they be?

For me, I would regret not spending more time with people and slowing down my life.  I would regret not sitting down with my mom and dad and asking them how they are doing, rather than rambling on about my life.  I would regret not enjoying sunsets more or taking time to really enjoy nature and my surroundings.  I would regret that I spent more time in front of a computer instead of with people.  I would regret hours that I spent watching sports and not playing sports.  Ultimately, I would regret my time and more specifically, time with my loved ones.

Good news.  You are still alive and you are not dying tomorrow.  Use your regrets and turn them into action.  Consider this a second chance.  Life is too precious to continue living how you don't want to. Spend more time with your family.  Turn off your laptops.  Appreciate the simple things.  Enjoy the conversations and relationships.  Find the joy in your work and if you don't enjoy your job, look for something that you do enjoy.  It's time we appreciate life more.  If you don't know where to start, start appreciating the people in your life.  They are what makes life great.

You see, time is so precious, because we can't get more of it.  It can't be bought, only used.  We can't control how much is allotted to us, but we CAN decide how we spend it.

How are you spending your time?

My Trip To Google

I had the opportunity of seeing Google a few weeks ago and I know how unusual an experience it was, so I thought I would write down my experience. Thanks to my buddy Ryan, I was able to go on a tour on Saturday and it was awesome!  The day before, I went to the headquarters with my friend Junkyu and we just walked around the campuses in admiration.  I posted a photo of myself and reached out on Facebook and the rest is history.  Thank you social media . . .and Ryan.

The first thing I noticed was how beautiful and well kept the grounds were!  It really felt like I was on sacred work ground.  Every building had bikes for employees to use, called "G-bikes".  They are colored in the famous Google primary colors and thy aren't particularly special in anyway, but the fact that they are from Google makes them awesome.  I had the privilege of riding a G-bike and it was smooth as butter.

In front of every building, they have electric car charge stations and the cool thing is that they are being used. We weren't allowed to go everywhere, but we did go into a few buildings and unfortunately, we weren't able to take pictures.  Every 150 ft. there are food stations that look like fully stocked kitchens filled with healthy snacks.  Fresh fruits, the best cereals, the best drinks.  It's all free!

Even the cafeterias are free and they have 2 that I know of.  One is made of all organic food and the other is a normal cafeteria.  Pretty amazing. My friend said that he hasn't bought groceries in 6 months ha ha.  How amazing is that?

The air quality is the best in the world.  The CEO and Co-Founder, Larry Page, is a big believer of air quality and wants his employees to breathe in the best air you can possibly breathe.

We went to the main amphitheater where they have their big announcements every Thursday (they call it TGIF, but it is held on Thursday, for offices that are in China, since it is Friday for them).  All of the chairs and tables are in the Google colors.
 
The building where Larry Page's office is fun more than anything.  He has a slide that goes from his office to the main floor.  The setting where he meets with "important people" is furnished with drink coolers, snacks, pool tables, arcades, and a foosball table.

Outside, we saw their swimming treadmills and they are free to use whenever.  It truly is an amazing place and would be so fun to work.  My friend absolutely loves working for Google and he had nothing, but good things to say. He works with amazing people from all over the world and their working stations are more communal than anything. He has done well for himself and I am happy for him!

The only downside to seeing Google was the depressed feeling I had when I left and realized I had to go to back to my job, which I actually loved before I saw Google ha ha.

It is no wonder why it is ranked the best place to work in America!  God bless you Google. 

Time and Money

TIME & MONEY.  Is it possible to have both?  Which is more important? Which brings more happiness?

I went to an International Dinner last week and one of my former professors, Ali Cook, spoke.  She brought up the point that in life, in regards to traveling, you either have time to travel and no money, or you either have money and no time.  Her point was that you need to travel when you have the chance and she put in a plug for studying abroad.

Anyone who knows me remotely well, knows that I love to travel.  I think it is the greatest and you could say that I have the traveling bug for sure.  The more places I go, the more I learn about other places I want to go.  It is amazing!  My entire life I have heard older people complain about TIME & MONEY.  They say that when you have enough TIME to do things, you don't have enough MONEY.  Or when you have enough MONEY, you don't have enough TIME.

5 years ago, I was living in Houston, TX.  I saw the commercials for the Nissan Cube and I thought they would be fun to drive, so I decided to test drive one. There was a Nissan dealership near our apartment and I went over one day after work.  I wasn't serious at all, I just wanted to experience the Cube. I had to drive it with a salesman, which kind of sucked, but it was still way fun.  My brother was in the back and it was like driving a living room around ha ha - ultimate space.  (does this story have a point . . .)  After the test drive, the salesman said that the Manager wanted to have a minute with me in his office.  I really didn't want to go, but I felt obligated and I was intimidated ha ha.  I was in their for 3 minutes and I bought the car with the worst interest rate you could get ... ha ha.  jk.
The Manager greeted me at the door and asked me and my brother to have a seat.  He asked me what my interest level was and I told him straight up that I was just looking around and that I wasn't in any position to buy a new car.  He asked me what was holding me back and I though about it and said, "Time and Money".  His reply caught me off guard.  He said, "Well neither of us can control time, but I can control the money."  I never bought the car, but I have always remembered his response.

2 years ago, I was working from home doing online marketing.  I was starting my business and wasn't making that much money, but I had time on my side and it was great.  I was going camping and fishing nearly every weekend and golfing almost everyday.  I really wanted to travel with all of the free time I had, but I didn't have that much money.  I was having a good time, but I wasn't content.

Last year, I added a full-time career at USU on top of my online marketing business.  I have consistently worked around 70 hour weeks since.  I have had plenty of money (not rich by any means), but I haven't had any time.  I think I went fishing once and I only play golf about twice a month now.  Now that I have more money, I would love to travel more, but I don't have much time.  I'm glad I'm working hard and have more money, but I am not content.

I ask again.  Which is more important, TIME OR MONEY? Is it possible to have both?  I have thought a lot about it over the years, especially this past week.  Having been on both sides of the spectrum, I feel like I need both to feel content.  I certainly believe it is possible.  I would define a rich man as having both and this is now my ultimate goal.  To have enough money to do what I want and enough time to do it in.  Sounds too good to be true.  Maybe it is wishful thinking.

What do you think?

Life is only as good as the people in it

Life is only as good as the people in it. 

Throwin’ down some real ish now.  I just got back from a business trip to South Korea.  South Korea holds a special place in my heart, because I spent a year and a half there at perhaps the most crucial point in my life.  I was debating whether to join the National Guard or study abroad and teach English.  As destiny had it, I received a scholarship to Korea and the rest is history.  During my time, I never could have imagined the world that opened up to me.  I met some of the best people from all over the world and I am still friends with them today. 

Present time.  Needless to say, I was excited to go back.  I had an educational fair in Busan (the 2^nd largest city in South Korea) and a 2-day fair in Seoul.  I was able to go to my university, Keimyung University in Daegu as well.  Although the trip was great and I was in a country that I loved, I couldn’t help but feeling lonely.  I felt empty the entire trip.  I walked the same streets that I walked hundreds of times and ate at the same restaurants, but it wasn’t the same.  While in Daegu, I felt like I had a memory on nearly every block in Jungagno and Banwaldong, but this time was different.  All I had were memories.  When I took a step back, I realized that there really isn’t anything particularly cool in Korea, but my friends and the people that I met made Korea what it is and was for me.  This is an ultimate shout out to THE PEOPLE.  At this moment, I came to the realization that, “Life is only as good as the people in it!”  I know that probably sounds cliché, but I don’t care – it’s true.  I have had the pleasure of meeting and knowing the best people in the world and although I might not have been as grateful for you guys back then, I sure am now. 

I kind of felt like Marius from “Les Miserables”, minus the Kermit the Frog vibrato, when he sings “Empty Chairs and Empty Tables”.  Not nearly as sad or depressing, nobody I know has passed away or been killed, but I experienced a sliver of his pain ha ha.  I don’t know why I am laughing. 

In a nutshell, this isn’t meant to be some life changing post, but it was a great realization to appreciate the people in your life.  

I look back at perhaps the best summer of my life.  I was 23 and I moved home for the summer with my 2 younger brothers.  I had a small Chevy s10 that had like 200,000 miles on it and no money.  My brothers, Sam and Jon were poorer than I was and we drove around Logan like we owned the place.  We didn’t do anything particularly awesome, but our Winger and cinefour nights were pretty bad-a.  I had a blast being with them, not because we were in an awesome place or did tons of awesome things.  I was with the best people and we had a heck of a time.

I am sure we can all reflect times in our lives that were amazing and realize, aside from the people, they weren’t or wouldn’t be as great.  So, appreciate your loved ones.  Something I learned last summer that I kind of forgot lately was that people are the most important part of life.  Without people, we are nothing and we have nothing.  I truly believe that if we love, appreciate and take care of the people in our lives now, that it doesn’t really matter what happens after this life.  That is the most important thing we can do. 

Life is only as good as the people in it. 

17 Mile Drive

This past weekend, I went on a trip with my friend Junkyu to the San Francisco area.  I had never been before, aside from the airport and have always wanted to go.  It was a short trip, but it was amazing.  The first day, we drove over to the Google headquarters and that was an incredible experience that I will write about later.  The point of this post comes from my drive down to Pebble Beach through Monterey.

In between Monterey and Pebble Beach is the famous "17 Mile Drive".  I could have driven this for days.  It was one of the prettiest things I have ever seen.  I love golf more than anything and I pulled over like 100 times to take pictures of the courses, homes, forests, and the ocean.  Pictures and writing will never do it justice, it is just incredible and must be viewed in person.

While driving, I thought to myself of what it must be like to live at a place like this.  I definitely want to someday.  I think most people do.  It was everything I want in a neighborhood and life when I am older and much more successful.  A vintage, classy-one of a kind home nestled in the woods, next to the ocean and a golf course.  Sounds like heaven.  I sure hope heaven is like that ha ha, but serious.  The more I drove, the more I thought, "Well, if this is what you want, are you on the path to get it?"  I feel like I have worked hard and I am grateful for where I am at now, but to be honest, I think the answer is "No".  I'm sure we all feel like this sometimes, maybe it is just me and the 2 readers that I get a month are thinking, "This guy is an arrogant son of a gun".  But . . .here it goes . . I am just going to write as it comes . . .

You know in Disney movies, where the main character (the awesome hero) has that moment when he/she feels like there is more out there and feels like he/she is meant for something more?  I felt like that during this trip.  It is funny, because I feel like my life in Logan, UT is awesome.  I love working for Utah State University and doing my design business on the side, but I just felt like I was exposed to more out there this past weekend!  I FEEL like there is more out there.  Most of my friends got their degrees, got married, got a stable job, bought a home, and started having kids.  Not that there is anything wrong with that.  That is the American Dream!  I'm happy for my friends that have done that and sometimes I wish I was on that path, but I haven't truly wanted that.  I've wanted to be different, stand out, and do something big.  Not because I feel like I am better, but just because I was never interested in that life.  I want to do something big and different, and my own.  I want to make an impact on the world and make a difference.  I can totally see my mom telling me, "And you think having a family isn't going to make an impact on the world?".  Yes, I do.  I'm sure it's the best thing I can do.  I would love to fall in love, get married, and have children . . .but . . .I want to travel, meet new people, experience new cultures, AND . . . I want to do or be a part of something big.  I believe that I can do it all.  For someone who is truly not gifted at any one thing, I must sound like the ultimate jackass, but why not?  I want to live the best life I can.

My biggest fear is settling.  I can't stand people that settle.  One big frustration I have working for a university is that they don't fire anyone.  If people suck, they just get shifted around.  If you work hard and excel, you don't get rewarded.  At times, I feel like it is the ultimate workplace for people that want a safe bet.  I don't want a safe bet.  I want to take a gamble on myself. I think we all should.  I believe the man upstairs wants us to be successful.  I truly do.

My favorite character in any movie is William Parrish (Anthony Hopkins) in Meet Joe Black.  William is at the end of his remarkable life and Death comes to take him, but before He does, He wants to learn from William and walk in his shoes.  Death comes disguised as a human (Brad Pitt) and names himself, Joe Black.  Joe follows William around and learns from him for a few days.  At William's last night before he dies, he looks over at Joe Black and says, "Do I have anything to fear?" Joe looks at William and says, "Not a man like you."  That gives me goosebumps.

That's what I want!  I want to live a life with no regrets.  To make a difference.  To look back at my life and be so proud of what I have left behind.  I want to be challenged, proved, and I want to conquer.  I want to push myself and do something great.  Is that too much to ask?

I feel like this every now and then.  Restless.  It usually comes after I have traveled.  I try to learn something from every trip I go on.  This one feels different.  We'll see.  Ultimately, my strongest desire is to reach my potential and do God's will.  I guess if I have this mindset, that is the most important thing.  There is no way I can settle if this truly is my desire.

(By the way, while I was writing this last part, I was listening to Farewell song from "Pocahontas".  It is the best!  It's my journal jam.  If you want a good ponder song, I highly recommend it.)

Thanks for reading.

The Extraordinary Ordinary Day

I had a hard time sleeping last night.  Yesterday was one of the best days of my life.  I sat in bed thinking about how amazing my day was and why I was feeling the way that I did and I relived the events of the day in my head.  To the outside eye, my day looked like this:

I woke up at 5:30am, showered and got ready to do an open house for work at the College of Southern Idaho.  I met up with a representative from the Air Force, named Sheldon at Utah State University at 6:00am and we drove up to Idaho together.  The drive was through the ugliest part of Idaho and I was super tired.  I was bobbing my head for most of the trip, trying to stay awake.  We arrived earlier than expected and went to Maverick to get breakfast.  I bought a Krispe Kream donut that wasn't very good, chocolate milk, and a breakfast sandwich.  The open house went well, nothing special.  We met a lot of nice people and I made some great connections in the international office - relevant to my job at USU.  We ate lunch at this Mexican restaurant and drove home.  I purchased a 5 hour energy and figured that $4 was a fair price to stay awake and stay alive ha ha.  I dropped off Sheldon and dropped off some items in my office and drove home from USU with my brother Mike.  When I got home, I finished my taxes, figured out how to program my car remote, made my famous cake shakes for my roommates and played pool against my brother and went 1-7 ha ha.

The amazing thing about this day is that is was nothing special.  I was super happy and it was great!  Maybe to the outside eye, my day was normal or even sucked, but this is how I saw and experience it:

I woke up at 5:30am.  I was nervous to meet Sheldon, because he's is in the Air Force and I didn't want to drive all day with a strict soldier - we would have nothing in common.  When I met him, he was wearing a New England Patriots beanie and coat- we were best buddies.  We talked about sports, life, religion, and traveling.  He was great!  Although the drive was not necessarily pretty, the sun was coming up and it made the few snow capped mountains look gorgeous. Breakfast at Maverick was not ideal, but the fact that I could eat any type of a sandwich with my braces was a big step for me! The staff at the Open House was fantastic and everyone at CSI was super friendly.  My connections in the international office were super helpful and supportive of my recruiting efforts to USU.  Lunch was at one of the best Mexican restaurants I have ever been to for the price.  When I returned home, I reunited with my brother and he had a great day, which was nice to hear.  I came home, finished my taxes, programmed a car remote that I have been messing with for about a week, made my famous cake shakes with a new ingredient - but the original is better, and finally beat my brother at pool after losing 7 times in a row ha ha. Persistence paid off, just like Tom Brady being down by 10 in the 4th quarter - best super bowl ever ha ha ha.  My brother scratched on the unlikeliest of shots and I was laughing so hard.  The 1 win was all I needed.

That's it . . . that's my amazing day! (You are probably thinking . . . "This guy's life sucks!")

Not too long ago, a friend of mine asked me about the best days of my life.  I didn't have to think about it too long before answering . . . St. Andrews, Scotland . . . traveling in East Asia . . . fishing in Alaska . . . spending a day at a resort in Mazatlan.  I know I have had a blessed life, for which I am grateful, but I felt bad thinking that all of the best days of my life were far away, doing pretty cool things that I will probably do once in my life.  She told me some of her best days . . . they were just average days (in my opinion) with her family.  But, she cherished the simple things.  I thought that night . . .  the best days of this girl's life were the average, ordinary days we all live . . . everyday.

I thought about this all week and it is not like I was intentionally planning on having a "best day" yesterday, it just happened. I attribute it to my perspective.  When I was a missionary in Toronto, Canada, I had the pleasure of learning from one of the best men I've ever met.  His name is Brad Mahoney and he taught me that life is full of miracles, but the real miracle is being able to recognize the miracles.  This perspective changed my mission and my life, until I lost sight of it when I returned home.  I fortunately regained this perspective this week and the result was incredible!

It reminds me from a scene from my favorite movie, "About Time".  The main character has the ability to travel back in time any day in his life and this is what he realizes at the end:



When I started writing, I had no intention of making this sentimental, but I guess it is a sentimental topic.  How amazing life could be if you had this perspective everyday, enjoying each moment - good and bad, learning from experiences, and being grateful for the journey.

Kind of changing topic, but kind of not . . .

Last Fall, I visited a friend in New York.  We had some great talks about life and she said that a lot of her friends are jealous of her life in the "Big Apple", because all they see are the amazing posts on Instagram and Facebook.  They don't see the day-to-day events, feeling uncomfortable on the subway, the inconveniences of not having a car, the unsettling feeling that you are on your own in one of the biggest cities in the world.  Social media tends to do us a disservice, because it is creating a false life that we portray to others.  (As I use social media to explain this point ha ha).  But, I am guilty of this too.  I tend to only post things when I am traveling or doing something that is awesome.  I NEVER POST ABOUT THE ORDINARY DAY, but I should.  Think if we all posted about the ordinary day.  There would be less comparing, less hating our lives, less depression.  Looking back, the worst times in my life are when I have compared myself to others.  I have learned the hard way recently that the people that I thought had the best lives, were struggling the most.  Everyone puts on a front, and sometimes you need to, but let's stop comparing our lives and let's make it easier on each other.

I felt super bad when I was in England last fall.  One of my friends on Facebook messaged me and said something like, "I am so jealous of your life man.  What do you do for a living?  You seem to be traveling all the time."  Anyone who knows me personally knows I don't have any money, I traveled a few times last year, but that was an unusual year.  I have a fun job at USU, but I don't make that much, my family is huge and super poor too ha ha, but I am happy with where I am at.  I felt bad that I portrayed a life I don't have.

So, the point of all of this or a few points to learn:  each day can be amazing if we have the right perspective.  We don't have to spend tons of money and travel to the other side of the world to have "The Best Day".  There is always something to be experienced, learned, and enjoyed.  APPRECIATE THE EXTRAORDINARY ORDINARY days you have and lets stop comparing our lives to someone's vacation.

The Donut Tour

For lunch today, the dream team (me, Lauralee, Shelby, and Fota) decided to go find out which place in Logan has the best donuts.  Each place we went to, we asked which donut was the most popular.  Here is what we found:

Lee's Marketplace.  Lee's is a hometown grocery store, expensive, but clean and I like shopping there.  The best part of Lee's is the lunch special.  You can get 2 chicken items, 2 amazing sides, a roll and a drink - $6.  It is the ultimate deal in Logan.  I especially like the mashed potatoes and gravy - the best I have ever had.  Since I recently got braces, I have taken advantage of their creamy goodness.  Back to the donuts . . . the baker lady said that the plain old-fashioned glazed was the best seller, but we decided to go with a chocolate covered cinnamon roll (seen below).  Since there were 4 of us and we didn't want to overload on donuts, we decided to get 2 donuts at each place and split them. My father has diabetes and it is not something that I want ha ha ha ha ha, but serious.  

Shaffer House Bakery.  This place is awesome.  Right when we walked in, we could smell the fresh goodness.  I was sold.  They had delicious looking turnovers and pastries - I wanted to bag the donut search and just settle down with a nice flaky turnover.  On to donuts . . . we found out the Bavarian cream bar was the most popular, so we got one of them . . .and 2 delicious looking Reese's cake donuts.  Definitely excited to pound down those little homies.

Dunkin' Donuts.  Brand new to Logan.  Today was the grand opening, actually.  It's like it was destiny for us to do our donut tour today.  I have only had Dunkin' Donuts in Korea and I wasn't a fan, so I was skeptical.  There weren't too many people for the grand opening, but there were enough to notice something was going on.  The owner gave us a donut hole while we were in line. I think he called it a "Munchkin" and it was delectable.  They said the most popular was the blueberry cake, so we got 2.  Also, they were giving out free hot chocolate and coffee.  I guess they are doing it for the next 3 days, ahh yeah.  I had salted caramel hot chocolate and it was money in the bank.  8 ball corner pocket.  

Johnny O's Spudnuts.  I think this place is a few months old.  I hear there are 7 potatoes in each donut.  That's not true.  This place has the coolest interior and decorations.  There are lounges to chill and you would think that a young hipster started this business, but there were 2 old grandma's running the joint.  They were nice, but when we said we only wanted 2 donuts, they seemed disappointed.  They tried to sell us 6 or 8 ha ha.  Geez grandma, I ain't gettin' any younger.  We bought 2 fluffy maple bars.   

Game Time!  Look at this healthy lunch. 

And the winner is . . .

They all sucked and I am never eating another f'n donut again.  ha ha.  Just kidding.  I think we all agreed that the Bavarian cream bar from Shaffer House Bakery was the best, but we only had a small piece and it was just right.  If I had to eat an entire bar, it would make me sick.  But, a small taste was delicious!  We were also torn between the blueberry cake donut from Dunkin' and the maple bar from Johnny O's.  

Valuable Lesson Learned:

Don't eat donuts for lunch.  We immediately felt gross and felt sick and definitely not productive at work ha ha.  I can't feel my toes now and I'm experiencing frequent urination, headaches, blurred vision, and fatigue . . . 

The real lesson is one of friendship and unity.  The 3 co-workers that I journeyed with were my friends going into the donut tour, but now they are my brothers.  

Braces at 30

I am 30 years old and I just got braces.  I have had them for just over a week and these are my thoughts. 

My entire life, I have hated my teeth.  My bottom row is pretty straight, but I have some vampire chompers.  I used to work with kids at an After School Club program and kids would always ask me if I was a vampire ha ha.  That’s always good to hear.  My top row is terrible, vampire teeth, crooked front row and then they go way narrow in the back.  Of course, people are nice and have never said, “You need braces!”, but I have always wanted them.  I admire people that have straight teeth and I sure respect those people that have had braces in the past.  You have my respect.  Like most things that you don’t like about yourself, they bug you far more than they bug others.  But, I am not getting braces for others, I am getting them for myself.  For those of you who have already had braces, I am sure you can relate to the following.  For those that are older and thinking about getting braces, hopefully this can help persuade you (or not ha ha) to get braces and be a helpful and humorous guide to get you through.  

The worst part of braces:

-The questions! 

Question:  “Why didn’t you get braces when you were young?” 

Answer:  “Well, my family didn’t have the luxury of insurance when I grew up – so thanks for                   not making me feel like white trash. “

Question: “Hey, we are thinking about getting our 9 year old daughter braces.  Who did you                     go to?”

            Answer:   “Thanks for making me feel like white trash.”

            Question:  “I didn’t even think you needed braces, why did you get them?”

            Answer:  “Thanks for making me feel like I am vain and white trash.”

-Talking to people.  Everyone looks at your braces when they talk to you.  They say they can barely tell, but they can tell.  Before I speak to anyone, I tell them, “Sorry, I just got brace, so I apologize if you can’t understand me”.  The elephant in the room has been addressed. 

-Talking to girls.  It is embarrassing to not fully pronounce words (hard to pronounce my F’s and M’s) and the occasional drool that comes.

-Not wanting to talk at all, since your mouth hurts.  I was driving with my brother for 20 minutes and didn’t say 1 word, because it wasn’t worth it ha ha.  

-The cankers.  Oh, the cankers.  I have 3 inside my bottom lip, 2 inside my upper lip, and 1 in my cheek where my last bracket is. 

-Flossing.  It’s the worst.  The first night it took me 20 minutes and my jaw was sore from opening my mouth wider than I have before.  The first night, I had this crap floss that kept shredding in my brackets and I had strands of floss stuck in my teeth and brackets the next day.  Not to mention the bloody mess, since my gums were soar. After a week, I am brushing/flossing for about 10 minutes.

-Eating.  The first week, I was eating about 700 calories a day.  I ate Greek yogurt for breakfast, applesauce for lunch and soup for dinner.  I lost 5 pounds, had a headache every day and had no energy ha ha.  It sucked.  The worst was that  everyone around me was eating the most delicious foods you could imagine. Everything looks good when you can’t eat it. But, I guess that is a principle of life – everything is enticing when you can’t have it.  Now, I am starting to eat more normal food.  I ate a salad and it felt so awkward to chew.  I felt like I had more salad in my brackets then I actually ate.  When I went to the bathroom to check my teeth, it confirmed what I thought.  I guess I will eat soup whenever I eat out with other people.

-Wax.  The wax from the dentist’s office is crap.  I get 3 small rolls in 1 pack each time I come.  I go through the pack in 2 days.  It is not only hard to put on, but I need more of it.  My friend gave me ear plug wax (I know it sounds gross, but it is way better.) Instead of putting wax on the brackets that hurt the inside of my cheeks, I just roll a fat ball of wax out and put it across my top and bottom rows, like a mouth guard.  It looks ridiculous, but it feels amazing.

Pros:

-I am kind of OCD and I have to organize everything.  I feel like my teeth are getting organized, so in a weird way, it feels good.

-Only 58 more weeks.  Who’s counting?

-I get to eat healthy without being a dick about it.  Sometimes when you eat out with your friends, you don’t want to order healthy food to sound uppity and that usually makes others second guess what they are ordering.  So, this gives me an excuse without sounding like I am better than someone.

-I’ll have the best damn teeth you have ever seen!

If you have any tips, questions, or comments, I am happy to hear from you!

The World is Good

I hate the news.  I think it is negative and gives a false portrayal of how life is.  The news rarely talks about the good in the world.  Last year, I had the opportunity to go to China.  I had a struggle getting my VISA and it was much more difficult than I expected.  I was told by others and various posts online that it was because I am from the United States.  When I flew into Beijing, I was a little nervous to be honest.  I have met Chinese people before and they have been great, but the media had given me a false belief that China didn’t really like the USA.  I was told in a letter that accompanied my VISA that because I had a few months left on my passport, that there is a possibility that I wouldn’t be allowed to enter China.  This letter along with my preconceived notions about China not liking the USA only made me more uncomfortable.  As I approached the counter at the airport in Beijing with my VISA and passport, I was pretty nervous.  I handed the officer my papers and said, “Nee How Ma?”  (How are you in Mandarin). He looked at me sternly, didn’t say anything, and examined my paperwork for what seemed like 5 minutes.  I was certain there was a problem.  Then, in an instant, he stamped my passport and VISA aggressively and motioned me to go forward.  I gave a sigh of relief, I was in China and they accepted my VISA.  I was still reluctant.

 Later that day, I found myself at the Forbidden City.  I was the only white guy in a sea of Chinese people and felt like everyone was looking at me and to be honest, I felt like I was an intruder and like I wasn’t welcomed.  I made no effort to talk with anyone, because I felt like I wasn’t welcomed.  It was one of the most uncomfortable feelings I have ever experienced.  The next day, I went to the Summer Palace and although it was beautiful, my feelings remained the same.  I remember thinking on the bus back to my hotel, “Well, what everyone told me and everything I have read is true.  The Chinese people in China really do hate Americans.” I sat in my seat, staring out at the window thinking. We were stopped at a red light.  Another bus pulled up next to mine and it was packed with Chinese people.  I caught a Chinese woman staring at me from the other bus and I looked down immediately.  I glanced up quick to see if she was still looking at me and she was.  I am normally a friendly guy and if I was in the US, I would have totally waved, but I thought to myself, “No, you are in China, they don’t really say hi and besides, they don’t like Americans.”  Then I thought . . . “Screw it!”

I looked up and she was still looking at me with what looked like a sad, tired, serious look.  I looked back at her, smiled, waved my hand, and mouthed, “Hello!” and awkwardly bowed my head.  I will never forget her reaction and it was one of the best experiences I had in China and one of the best lessons of my life.  She immediately changed here entire countenance like she woke up from a sleep.  Her eyes got big, she smiled, waved back and whispered, “Hello!” and awkwardly bowed back.  She was smiling so bright and I was too.  The light turned green and her buss accelerated faster than mine we smiled at each other until we could no longer see each other.  I had about an hour bus ride before I arrived at the hotel and just remember sitting in my seat and being so happy.  I thought, “That was amazing!  I think they (the Chinese people) like us!  The news is full of crap.  Maybe they think we don’t like them and we think they don’t like us.”  That moment, I changed how I thought about China (and other nationalities for that matter) and I was saying hi to everyone.  The change I felt about China couldn’t have been more opposite.  I remained in China for 4 more days and it was amazing!  The people were incredible and I love that country!

When I got home, I really felt like I had become a better person.  This small experience has helped me to appreciate others more, especially those people from other countries. I think the media creates false stereotypes and it isn’t fair.  I believe people are inherently good. I also believe that if we treat people like they suck, they will suck (or at least we will perceive them that way).  The world is full of great, amazing people . . . maybe all it needs is for people to believe it.

Service and Gratitude

This same time last year, I felt kind of lost or stuck.  It was probably one of the few times, maybe the only time that I was frustrated with my life.  I had experienced some cool things, but felt like I wasn't where I should be at my age.  I decided to go to the temple (temples are the most sacred buildings for LDS people - usually a place I can ponder and think clearly) and I remember praying for direction in my life.  At the time, I was praying about where to live, where to work and felt like I was on my own.  While I was praying/pondering, I really felt a voice in my head or a feeling in my heart that I needed to 1. Be grateful for my life and 2. Serve others.

I went home and those 2 things (service and gratitude) consumed all of my thoughts.  I started saying prayers of gratitude and not asking God for anything, but just being grateful for him and I focused on the good things in my life.  If bad things happened, I still thanked God for them and tried to learn from them to become better.  I started to be involved more in service and was always looking for ways to help out.  I can tell you that those two things (service and gratitude) changed my life.  I had an incredible year in 2014 and everything worked out way better than I could have imagined.  After a few months, I found myself not asking for anything at all in my prayers, because I couldn't believe life was so good and I was truly grateful for everything.  It seems that whenever things are tough for me in my life, it is because I am selfish and comparing myself to others.  If I remember to be grateful for what I have and to serve others, I feel that I am not only happier, but I really feel like life is better in every aspect.  This is a pattern I always need to remember.  I can't be successful in my life if I don't do things for others.  People will always be the best part of life, so let's take care of each other and be grateful for the process that we call life.